Hello!

My name's Ripley. Could you please help me out? I just joined this forum today because I needed a little bit of help with a song I was writing! I started learning Irish about a year or two ago (I'm nowhere near fluent, though! I'm still a beginner of sorts, heh) but I attempted to write a song/poem in Irish.

The English translation is pretty far-off from the Irish (it's more of idea-for-idea) but I actually wanted to ask for some reassurance in my spelling and sentence structure. If you'd like me to post the English lyrics, then I will by all means!

If anyone could help me out I'd be very grateful!

Here's the song (and yes, i know, it probably doesn't make much sense.)

(And I GUARANTEE, I KNOW that the grammar in this is god-awful. That's why I came here: I'm terrible at it and need some help!)

Run, bí suan (ag chanadh)
Mhara Amhran
Bhíomar Na chlann
Na Lír



Seanachai
Eachtrach tri
Teastaíonn uathu imeacht
Ba mhaith liom bí.

Eachtrannach trá, agus
Deich mile bliain na grá
(sí chanadh an)
Amhrán na bua
No bás.

Bheigh sí roghnaigh
go fan?
Liom ag an chlann?
No bheigh (vague) sí roghnaigh (rownig)
go cas?


Rún bí suan
Mara Amhran
Na rhonda bhan
Na Lír.


Agus Seanachai
Eachtrach trí
Go luach Saoirse
BÍ!





If anyone would mind editing this hunk o junk for me so it makes sense it'd be a big help! Thank you so much! (And again, the song is supposed to be incredibly vague. It's intentional ^^')

Sorry to bother, have a blessed day, and thank you so much!


Ripley

Oh.. and the "rhonda" part? That was the only work I could find. "Seal woman" as in selkie. It's for a cartoon/comic dub about selkies..

Haigh a Ripley!

Right, well to be totally honest, that Irish doesn't make much sense at all, but sure that's only to be expected for a beginner! Fair play for the effort though
Here's one stab at trying to get the meaning across.

I will point out that although selkies appear in Irish mythology, they're not normally distinguished from mermaids, and therefore (also) called "maighdeana mara" (maidens of the sea) or "murúcha" (mermaids) (note; murúch < murdúch [Old I] < muir "sea" + dúchann "chant/song/melody"). The Scottish Gaelic Wikipedia has terms such as "Neach-rón" (person-seal) and "seilchidh", which would probably give something like "Rónriocht" and "Seilchí" in Irish, but they're completely made up, so I used mermaids. For something so specifically about selkies though I hope this'll do...

Anyway here's the quick translation:

Sámh ort, a linbh,
Is cas fonn na farraige
Óir ba muidne
clann lir.

An seanchaí mná,
Agus léise triúr gall,
(Tá) Mian saoirse á gcrá ach
Táimse sásta mar atáim.

Sna tíortha i gcéin
Ina bhfuil seanghrá i réim
Is fút féin bás nó séan
A ghlacadh led’ ghlór binn.

Ach an roghnóidh sise
fanacht anseo linne?
Nó an ngéillfidh sí don
Phian faoina toinn?

Sámh ort a linbh!
Seo fonn na farraige
Ó mhaighdeana mara
Chlann lir.

Fan ar an seanchaí
Is ar a triúr coimhthíoch,
Beimid gan mhoill
Saor go síoraí!

Here's the altered meaning:

Tranquillity on you (rest), o child,
And sing the song of the sea
For we were
The children of the sea.

The woman story-teller
And with her three foreigners
A desire for freedom is tormenting/grieving them but
I am pleased as I am.

In the distant shores (lit. lands)
Where an old love flourishes
It is up to you to take death or prosperity
With your sweet voice.

But will she choose
To stay here with us?
No will she succumb/yield to the
Pain under her skin/within her (lit. under her waves)?

Tranquillity on you (rest), o child,
This is the song of the sea
From the mermaids (lit. maidens of the sea)
Of the children of the sea.

Wait for the story-teller
And for her three foreigners
We will be soon enough
Free forever!

This is just one idea, of course

HOLY MOLY MAN! That's AMAZING! Thank you SO MUCH!

Dude, you have no IDEA how amazing that is! Thank you so much! It's beautiful!