I've decided to take the plunge. After years of staring in envy at tattoo requests, I'm finally saying that's it, I want one of them and I'll be damned if Breandán can stop me.

I'm looking to get all seven volumes of Annála Ríoghachta Éireann tattooed on my body.

Volume 1 => head
Volume 2 => arms
Volume 3 => legs
Volume 4 => back
Volume 5 => arse
Volume 6 => feet
Volume 7 => stomach lining (nobody reads the indices anyway)

Volume 5 has symbolic significance as it covers a period when Ireland was divided, just as the two cheeks of an arse are (yes, I know, abstract. Just picture an abitrary arse and you'll understand though)

However I only want volume 1 in the Classical Irish of the original. Volumes 2-4 should be in each of the three dialects, five in Scots Gaelic, six in Manx and seven in Old Irish.

If you guys could get that to me by about 08:37 next Thursday it'd be grand, that's when my appointment is. Obviously the tattoos will be sequential and I can do Munster myself, so Bríd you'll need to be first with Connacht, Lughaidh I'll give you a bit of time, say about an hour after for Ulster.

Cheers.

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The dialect I use is Cork Irish.
Ar sgáth a chéile a mhairid na daoine, lag agus láidir, uasal is íseal

Caoimhín, I will need special care from you, as Scots Gaelic will be on the auld arse. Might need you to come with me to over see the operation. Let me know if you can make it.

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The dialect I use is Cork Irish.
Ar sgáth a chéile a mhairid na daoine, lag agus láidir, uasal is íseal

A thiarcais!
Poor Lon Dubh has finally taken leave of his senses!

(Is there a doctor in the house? … heh, heh )

Um, have you taken your meds today?

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I'm not a native (or entirely fluent) speaker, so be sure to wait for confirmations/corrections, especially for tattoos.

Mar a deirtear anso - Iasc an Aibreáin !

Remember it is customary to send a photo of the ink. Does Breandán need to organise extra space for all the photos you will be posting?

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Sure I'll see what he can do, apparently he's a big shot around here.

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The dialect I use is Cork Irish.
Ar sgáth a chéile a mhairid na daoine, lag agus láidir, uasal is íseal

Just remember...none but God may judge you!

As per usual, the Caighdeán and Urban Irish are discriminated against.

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Táim ag foghlaim fós. Fáilte roimh gach aon cheartúchán.

No Caoimhín, its much more serious than that. I'm afraid our friend has contracted Annála Ríoghachta psychosis, caused by just staring at the book. If you happen to open it, your mind melts as you try to decipher fact from fiction. Lon Dubh will never be the same again.

Annála Ríoghachta psychosis is considered, by the Irish Society For The Prevention Of Mad Yokes, as second only to Leabhar Mór na nGinealach psychosis in severity. Some say, reading passages from Leabhar Mór na nGinealach summons the devil and he can only be stopped by reciting the genealogy of every high king of Ireland for seven generations.

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Please wait for corrections/ more input from other forum members before acting on advice